A good fairy gifts you the sort of magically engrossing book that sends you to sleep almost as soon as you try to read it. Unfortunately, if you let it drop to the floor, as you fall asleep, so heavy is this book, that the loud noise will wake you up again.
I wish that dental bills were much cheaper to pay to get rid of my toothache.
Poof! Now the bills are much cheaper, but the methods (removing the tooth) are much less satisfactory.
I wish I had some chocolate chip cookies.
God rest you merry, gentlemen,
Let nothing you dismay.
Remember Christ our Savior
Was born on Christmas Day
To save us all from Satan's pow'r
When we were gone astray.
Voilà! Some chocolate chip cookies do arrive - along with chocolate chip ice-cream, chocolate chip cake, chocolate chip muffins, chocolate chip mousse, chocolate chip Bavarian, chocolate chip cheesecake, more chocolate chip cookies.... By that time, you will have had such a surfeit of chocolate chip anything & everything that, if still hungry, will be grateful for some other flavour.
I wish that job interviews weren't so harrowing to face.
Congratulations! You now breeze through every job interview you go for. Unfortunately, you still don't get any of the jobs.
I wish travel between the UK and Australia (which I'm about to do yet again, next week) could be faster and more comfortable.
"Now you are a lioness," said Aslan. "And now all Narnia will be renewed."
(Prince Caspian)
Congratulations, new technology has resulted in travel between Australia and the UK being both more comfortable and faster than it is now! Unfortunately, it costs far more than you could ever afford.
I wish I had more musical talent.
God rest you merry, gentlemen,
Let nothing you dismay.
Remember Christ our Savior
Was born on Christmas Day
To save us all from Satan's pow'r
When we were gone astray.
Boom! Tish! Bang! You do have more musical talent. You become top of the pops, people swoon over your melodies, and you become the latest media sensation. But the price for all this media glamour is that your life will no longer be your own, leaving no time to spend on other enjoyable things that you might also like to do.
I wish that for the next six months we have no more bad news, for a change.
Shazam! You have no more bad news for six months... because you're obliged to spend those six months confined to an isolation pod, with all food and other necessities provided, but no access to the outside world at all. Including no news at all of any sort, and no entertainment other than sappy cheerful "easy listening" music (all instrumental, no vocals) — which plays constantly — and lovely peaceful videos of flowers and butterflies and so on. All very relaxing, but long before your six months are up, you'll probably be desperate to get OUT OF THERE.
(PS. The magically provided meals are very nutritious but all ultra ultra healthy. No pavlova. )
I wish I could sleep better at night.
"Now you are a lioness," said Aslan. "And now all Narnia will be renewed."
(Prince Caspian)
You start sleeping better at nights, but you sleep too well and can never quite get up on time, making you late for work and your days much worse.
I wish car trouble was easier to deal with.
God rest you merry, gentlemen,
Let nothing you dismay.
Remember Christ our Savior
Was born on Christmas Day
To save us all from Satan's pow'r
When we were gone astray.
Oh, yes, you are no Robinson Crusoe in making such a wish. Ta Da! The government waves its magical wand to introduce a new taxpayer-funded training scheme for motor mechanics to help the unemployment rate, and yes, it might solve the problem in the long term. Unfortunately, the Long Term is too far in the future, & might be far too late to rescue your poor little car.
I wish that the wait to get "elective" surgery wasn't so long
You have been scheduled much more quickly for your surgery but your surgeon looks an awful lot like a comedic cartoon rabbit, and you have a feeling you're about to have a very eventful procedure.
I wish that flowers would last longer.
God rest you merry, gentlemen,
Let nothing you dismay.
Remember Christ our Savior
Was born on Christmas Day
To save us all from Satan's pow'r
When we were gone astray.
Bingo! Now all flowers in the world last forever... but as this means they never go to seed, extinction is now looming for every flowering plant on the planet.
I wish my favourite brand of chocolate wasn't so expensive.
"Now you are a lioness," said Aslan. "And now all Narnia will be renewed."
(Prince Caspian)
Hooray! Your favourite brand of chocolate did become much cheaper, for a while. But that was only because the firm went bust, & unfortunately, was wound down, so that particular delicious chocolate won't ever be available again, after the firm was finally liquidated.
I wish that growing older didn't involve worsening health problems occurring.
Ta-da! Growing older no longer involves worsening health problems occurring, at least for you, because you've turned into an Ent. Which means you now have a lifespan of thousands of years ahead of you — and very little interest in the affairs of Mortal Men, unless they try to cut down your trees, of course.
I wish I could find the perfect new car for me.
"Now you are a lioness," said Aslan. "And now all Narnia will be renewed."
(Prince Caspian)
You found it! Unfortunately once located, it decided to play hide and seek??
I wish my kitty had a new scratching post.
I have it for you! I hope it isn't too far away, at the local Post Office?
I wish I could go back in time and do all the exercise I failed to do.
There, shining in the sunrise, larger than they had seen him before, shaking his mane (for it had apparently grown again) stood Aslan himself.
"...when a willing victim who had committed no treachery was killed in a traitor's stead, the Table would crack and Death itself would start working backwards."