Treatment? Interesting challenge. I'll give that some thought. I shall return later with more thoughts.

Basically, my VDT would be more of a detective story. I would spend more time emphasizing the mystery of what happened to the seven lords. They sailed into unknown waters and never returned...that's curious. I would also spend a lot more time emphasizing the characters' excitement about Aslan's country.

The filmmakers would have been better off just embracing VDT as an episodic story than trying to arm-wrestle it into something else. The result was a total mess.

He did not give VDT, specifically, the sort of plot structure that would lend itself to a feature film.

I don't see what is wrong with the structure. Forest Gump doesn't really have a villain or, really, any kind of central conflict at all. But it works because Forest is a great character and the movie deals with themes that are universal. We stay with it because we want to know what is going to become of this character.

The filmmakers would like us to believe that episodic stories are inherently uncineamtic. They aren't. They're just difficult to get right, because it means you have to create really compelling characters....like Lewis did. The filmmakers took the easy way out and added an imminent threat (the mist) and action sequences.

All episodic stories that work have one emotional angle that drives teh story. In Forrest Gump, it was his love for Jenny.

But what would have been the emotional angle for VotDT is the sense of longing for Aslan's country, and facing their personal flaws as they journey into the unknown.

They could have filmed it more faithfully to the book and it would have been better. But the reason the film was not "great" is because it had horrible editing, uninspired directing, cheesy dialogue, cardboard characters, and no depth.

But the reason the film was not "great" is because it had horrible editing, uninspired directing, cheesy dialogue, cardboard characters, and no depth.

Right. A lot of fans disliked PC, but at least it was a pretty well-made film. It had decent acting, great cinematography, beautiful costume design, fantastic locations, and mostly seamless visual effects.

Unlike VDT, is also had a coherent plot.

Opening scene would be pretty much as it it is the film (Camebridge and all that) But I would go streight to the scrub house where Eustace would be writing in his diary (The room set would be similar if not the same). You would hear talking coming from the next room.
Cross cut to the next room where Ed and Lucy would be chatting away. Eustace would come in and scene would continue. (Pretty much the same for this bit and the painting bit)

In narnia, they should show more about life on the dawntreader. The cabins and rowing, and show Edmund helping to row/somthing like that, while Eustace refuses.

They should sail to the lone Islands and when they get there it shoukld be quiet and at sunset. They take a walk, Eustace trailing behind and he gets captured first! Then slowly the others are taken off with just a bit of retaliation from Caspian and Ed. (I'm thinking like the velociraptor scene from Jurrassic Park?)

Afterwards, everyone should be chained up outside in the pitch dark. Eustace complaining while Caspian and Edmund try and think of an escape plan. they fall asleep with no plan made. When they wake up (Close up of eyes like VDT Eustace close up from the film- I loved that shot!) and it is morning...Sun is beating down and they see a small crowd gathering, more people arrive looking sinister but dressed poorly. They are auctioned off but when it is Caspians turn he struggles and shouts that '(he is) King Caspian of Narnia' everyone laughs but Lord Bern looks up frowning then recognises his and offers to buy Caspian. The auctionieer quickly sells Caspian and Bern takes him away. The others look back at him beeing led off. Once they are out of sight, Caspian trys to prove his identity but ~Bern is already convinced and they quickly head back to rescue the others. Once rescued they go to visit Grumpas. It is dark (Like the inside of the Chuirch in the film) and Grumpas is a large man dressed richly in contast with everyone else. Caspian and the others look worn out and scruffy and Grumpas laughs off their immediate accusations, but is anger Caspian draws his sword and threatens Grumpas. He is a greedy but intellegent man and recongnises the sword as a well made Narnian sword. He is taken away by the guards who realise Caspians identity.
They head back to the dawn treadr after Caspian hastily announces that the lone islands belong to Bern now.

More sailing ensues and we see reepicheep singing his song and bettering Eustaces intellegence. He then tries to steal the Orange and the scene from the film happens (I enjoyed the comedy element) However, the sword fight is in the storm and never finishes because thunder and lighning begins and everyone rushes to there posts. We here drinias telling Caspian that they don't have enough supplies to go on for much longer. Eustaces diary.

When the storm ends and the waves flatten they see dragon island/Goldwater (I would combine them because it is more interesting and everyone is occupied). Everyone sets off and Eustace slits away from the rest of the main cast (He has already wandered off once, it could be an irritating trait of his) He starts to climb down the slopes of a cliff because he sees gold and tresure at the bottom, but he hears a roar and slips down. as he looses conciousness he sees through blurred eyes a dragon coming towards him.
Meanwhile the others have descovered the lord at gold water and argue like in the film. They realise he is missing and someone exclaims that he is forever wandering off. They head out too look for him.
Eustace awakes and it is dark. He hears someone calling him, he tries to call back but can't, then he slowly realises that he is a dragon. He begins running towards the voices and subconciously begins flying. Crosscut to lucy who screams that she has seen a dragon. I liked the rest of how that scene played out so i'll leave it.
However, one night, Reepicheep is talking to Eustace but Eustace is sop upset at realising how mean he was to Reepicheep and everyone, so he crawls off and lyes down. He is awoken my a grown and sees Aslan, startled he 'jumps' up and Aslan asks if Eustace learned his lesson. Eustace nods sadly and so Aslan ferociously slashes once at Eustace, who cowers back. Aslan tries again and tears at the scales which turn to ash as if curned. Emurging for the ases is the newly reformed Eustace. He looks around but Asland has disappeared. He returns to camp and wakes everyone to appologise.

The next bits should stick to the book pretty much, untill the Ramadus Island bit.

Suddenly they notice this beautiful glow from the horizon in the night. They approach with caution but in awe, as if hypnotised. they land and Caspian and the rest head up, agains the warning of Reepicheep. It is as if they are being drawn by a spell or something. When they arive, They see the table with food layed out but several birds are still placing food on there and flying away. (Unusual.?) Sudenly, they see a shooting star, but it gets brighter and closer as if it is going to hit them, they cower back in fear and the star hits the ground and shatters in a beautiful fireworklike explosion. However, the debris is just light and the spell is broken on the cast. They speek to ramandu and Liliandil, then the firebirds come.

Liliandil shows them dark island in the distace, it is like a black hole. When the children leave, Caspian and Liliandil talk- character development- then Caspian promises to return to her once he has defeated the dark.

They head of streight away and once they arive in dark island, they notice how black hole like it is. They enter and it is pitch black but once the lanterns are lit there is a little light to see from. They hear hissing and scrurrying and scraping and screaming, and plops in the water. Sudenly a large scream and lord Rhoop is descovered. The scene plays out like in the film, and the sea serpent appears, everyone attacks it and Eustace has a mini fight, but Edmund takes over. Reepicheep congratulated Eustace and he is happy, but it is still battle.
Lucy preys that Aslan will help them and sudenly the albatross appears. It gives Edmund a sword like the one that peter had, and that sword can destroy the seaserpent. When the bird flys away into a pinprick of light, the light gets bigger like a reversed black hole. The serpent is slayed and the island is defeated. Lucy suggests that they follow the bird, so the set off quickly. The sun is brighter and larger and water is drawn for washing and cooling down in. They realise it is sweet and everyone drinks it. They don't appear so tired any more.

The rest should play out like the film did, I liked the ending minus the jill Pole reference but with the addition of a roar.

It needs padding out but it pretty much follows the book.
Thanks

All episodic stories that work have one emotional angle that drives teh story. In Forrest Gump, it was his love for Jenny.

I don't think I agree with your analysis of Forrest Gump. Forrest Gump is actually very similarly structured to VDT, the central thread (the relationship with Jenny), is underdeveloped, and not particularly compelling. The episodes are the whole point of the movie. The difference is that Forrest Gump holds a certain fascination for Americans who have lived through the mid-20th century, or people who have an interest in that part of history, because it takes moments in American history, holds them up and looks at them at a unique angle. Those were fiercely political times, and one so seldom sees them presented without political commentary, even in documentaries. VDT doesn't have that unique appeal. The individual episodes make for interesting reading, but taken together at one time, they are not strong enough for people to ignore the flimsiness of the central plot. Nothing was said in VDT that hadn't been said before.

I do agree that, for most episodic stories, you need a central thread to tie things together. If not a central plot, a central character, or a central relationship. With VDT, there is a strong thematic emphasis on intrapersonal struggle, which is why there is no central relationship. Also, there is no central character who's arc carries through the whole book. Rather, the focal character at any given point flip flops back and forth between Eustace and Lucy.

To make the journey to Aslan's country the central thread would be tricky, because that theme is proper to Reepicheep's character arc, and Reepicheep is a key supporting character, rather than a main character. The rest of the characters are intrigued by the idea of Aslan's country, and at the end, when Aslan's country is barely out of reach, Caspian (another supporting character) becomes overwhelmed with a desire to see it, but none of the main characters have that consuming longing that Reepicheep has. Trying to sell an emotion as the central thrust of a story doesn't work if the main characters don't feel it.

I don't believe that the journey to Aslan's country IS the central thread to the story. It's the "higher hope" that Reepicheep has, but the main reason for the voyage is to find the seven lords and for Caspian to set right what his Uncle did wrongly. I would have to think about how I would make changes.

Basically, my VDT would be more of a detective story. I would spend more time emphasizing the mystery of what happened to the seven lords. They sailed into unknown waters and never returned...that's curious.

Ooooh! Now you've got me interested. I'm a Sherlock Holmes fan myself. So your idea is to take the existing central plot and give it more umph. Maybe when they find one lord, they weave some clue as to the fate of the next lord into that story?

@Charlotte Rose: I love your visualizations of the individual episodes, especially the undragoning. It has the impact of the scene in the book without the creepy horror-movie factor that a literal depiction would have. Parcel off your treatment into sections and I think it would be a truly great mini-series, but I still don't think it would be a great movie. A good enough movie, perhaps; at least as good as the Fox-Walden version, quite likely, but it still doesn't have the narrative flow to make a great movie.

All episodic stories that work have one emotional angle that drives teh story. In Forrest Gump, it was his love for Jenny.

I don't think I agree with your analysis of Forrest Gump. Forrest Gump is actually very similarly structured to VDT, the central thread (the relationship with Jenny), is underdeveloped, and not particularly compelling.

Not compelling? Maybe for you it wasnt, but I thought it was done well and the ending was especially touching.

.....Now I don't want to hear people trying to explain to me what a great book it was. I'll concede that VDT was a wonderful book, a masterpiece of children's literature. I'll go you one better and say that, in the right hands, it could form the basis of the superlative mini-series......

See, I agree with you that it would have made a really good mini-series with the time factor longer and the mini-series format already being episodic. My treatment would probably be called the Eustace Scrubb show.

They would start off with the intro as they had it with Lucy's flooding bedroom and them emerging in the waters outside the Dawn Treader. But after they've introduced Eustace they would expand on his brattiness and show how he really rubs wrongly the whole crew and Reepicheep and Caspian and not just his cousins... Make finding the lords the mystery (per glumPuddle's ideas, which are on the mark). When they get to the Lone Islands then they would pretty much have scenes where they don't fight with the natives and Caspian really does try to talk his way out of trouble to gain the freedom of Lucy, et al....have Eustace continue to display his brattiness.

When they have the Dragon Island sequence have Eustace really get lost and depict the dark and lonely experience he has away from the crew and his cousins...great use of VFX and CGI here in the Dragon's Cave and seeing the other Dragon....build that suspense before he actually becomes dragoned....(so audience doesn't have any clue what will happen....especially if they aren't book readers).....
Have him look at his reflection in the pool of water and be horrified at what he's become. Have the cousins and crew look for him over the course of a few days and finally discover the Dragon him on the beach. Develop that pity that Lucy and the rest take upon him (this builds emotional investment). Show the feeling of isolation and loneliness.

Not sure how I'd do the undragoning (would have to think more on that part, as it is a bit tricky to translate onscreen)...maybe lots of CGI showing unlayering of skins in a non-graphic way....have Aslan really meet Dragon Eustace and take him up to the mountains (this could all be flashback intercut when they have the scene where Eustace explains to Ed how he became undragoned).

Do have that scene between Eustace and Edmund....show that Edmund actually gets what Eustace has been through as he's been through it himself and can fully empathize....this would show some character development/emotional investment as them actually getting along/bonding... and Edmund really caring about his cousin.

Do show the incidents with the sea serpent (not a major sea battle or climax for this treatment of the movie) and Deathwater. Have a few seconds of filler scenes that show how life is on the ship when they haven't landed and are just looking for land....a small scene of Lucy and Reep playing chess and Eustace having a cow at losing wouldn't hurt. Have Lucy's dilemma of helping the spell be removed from the Dufflepuds a real dilemma and show Ed, et al....really being concerned about letting her go off to meet the Magician by herself.

Show how happy the Dufflepuds are at being visible and do some neat CGI of them in the harbor when the DT sails away...when they get to Dark Island, make the atmosphere/setting really appropriately dark and make it a psychological mind game thing of fear....having also be stormy and visually made that they are going in mental circles....and not just the sensation of physically going in circles...hard to know how they could do this....maybe some really good VFX here.

When they get to Ramandu's Island leave it pretty much the way it was in the movie, but have Ramandu really show up and instruct them what they really need to do to break the enchantment....and then when they get to the Silver Sea...have some really cool CGI of the forest on the sea bottom below that Lucy sees and have her see more than just one sea person. Expand on them tasting the sweet water.......

Have Caspian really make it a dilemma for the crew about who really wants to volunteer and go with him onwards versus staying behind on the island....and then really show Caspian having his tantrum about not being able to go on with the rest and being scolded by Aslan....show the sleeping Lords really waking up after Reep's gone to Aslan's country but without any lines saying he deserved it... and Caspian and Lilliandil getting married and then have Pevensies and Eustace walking back into their world again....through same wall of water VFX...and resurfacing in Lucy's bedroom. End.

I think VDT could have been a great movie. I think LWW and PC were great movies, although they weren't perfect adaptations.

The problem is, VDT bored me. And it was changed too much. And it had anti-Biblical concepts in it. And it seemed shallow.

I think they should have spent more time on character interaction, the mystery of travelling to other worlds, etc. (Basically, elements in the book) and less on things like Green Mist and Seven Swords (basically, things that were not in the book). There are many movies that are episodic. I don't think the filmmakers can use that as an excuse.

I'm not going to go into any more depth than that, though. One, because I don't want to be guilty of fan fiction, like the Script-writing thread was closed down for. And two, I don't have to go into detail; I'm not a filmmaker, and so, not a fit person to adapt a book into a movie. I am not trained in movie making. (But filmmakers are, and so they should be able to do a better job than they are doing.) A fan and movie goer has the right to say whether they like or dislike a film. It was made for the moviegoer anyway. Just like I dont have to be a good singer myself to know if someone else is singing good or bad, I dont have to come up with a better movie idea to dislike someone else's movie idea. And I disliked VDT. I thought it was poorly made, and lacked quality.

~Riella

The problem is, VDT bored me. And it was changed too much. And it had anti-Biblical concepts in it. And it seemed shallow.

I don't agree VDT had anti-Biblical concepts in it at all. No it wasn't shallow. There were ethics in that film which aren't present in anti-Christian films. I think that those who want to claim that VDT the film is anti-Biblical should go back and read both the Narnia books and the Bible, and start recognising the difference between the two. Narnia was never anything more than C.S.Lewis' supposal of what Christianity might look like in a different world. Leave Narnia to the vivid children's fantasy it belongs to, and the 'anti-biblical' concepts to the ministers and the preachers.

And please leave the anti-Biblical accusations to the N & C forum, I beg of you. Just because ethics, including Christian ethics, bore you doesn't mean that VDT was a completely bad film.

I think VDT could have been a great movie. I think LWW and PC were great movies, although they weren't perfect adaptations.

I'm not going to go into any more depth than that, though. I don't have to go into detail; I'm not a filmmaker, and so, not a fit person to adapt a book into a movie. I am not trained in movie making.
~Riella

In a discussion of whether or not you like a given movie, I would agree that it is a matter of personal taste. Unless you are a paid film critic you don't need to provide more supporting evidence than your own immediate impressions of the film.

On the other hand, if you say that Dawn Treader COULD have been a great movie, that implies a certain artistic vision. If you can't visualize how VDT would work as a great film, how can you say that it could have been a great film at all? I maintain that people who claim that VDT could have been a great film, in the way that the book was a great book, are not thinking things through.

Btw, I thought that PC, with it's overdone duel-battle scene and it's excised character-development scenes, was pretty good, but quite flawed, and not, by any means a great movie.

To me I found what frustrated me the most with VDT was that some scenes to me were really amazing, and others were like "what the!!" Basically to make this a great movie, not necessarily a great adaptation, would have required a few changes in my opinion. First, it should have been about-20 minutes longer to flush out some plots and characters. Then they needed to get rid of some of the, at best, weak dialogue. That would have been easy. Not everybody agrees on what the worst lines are but there are some scenes that the lines at best are very clichéd. Finally, while I don't necessarily agree with the green mist being put into the movie, if they had at least explained it and expanded more on it would have improved upon the movie. They were so vague about what it was, that I never took it as seriously as I should have. This would go back to the time issue, I guess. So a lot of my issues with the movie, which I really enjoyed, were with the rushed pace. Then next some of the dialogue. Though Prince Caspian had its fair share of cheesy moments and lines. If you change those things this movie shines to me.