I hath never inscribed mine recipies. They art safe.
And I hath tested a new recipie for poppy-seed bunt cake. Wouldst anyone like a piece?

Friends, A most horrendous expirience hath just happened to me, I was in the chatroom and NarniaNerd, a profuse member of the LoSRM Started talking and long story short, we had a conversation in which he tried to reveal several very much spoiled details of the movie to me which I am currently trying forget, I feel I must warn yee, bewarenst that similar accidents could be rushed upon you as well.

It blesseth me to see the Monastery thrive yet again. I hath spent much time in meditation, practice with mine skills with a blade, and much more time working on computer software engineering. The release of the latest trailer tempteth me not. I hath seen the first two trailers ast they wast released before the vows I hath taken and they art the official released trailers, but this new one tempteth me not. Especially with just 30 days until the glorious viewing.

And curious, this is something that the Lair can discuss ast well shouldst they enter our hallowed walls. How doest thou plan to attend thy viewing? Shalt thou attempteth to attendeth the Midnight Showing? Shalt thy see it Opening Day upon Friday, December 10th? That weekend? Or shalt thy need to wait painfully longer shouldst a theater not be available.

It shalt be painful for me because I have a Final Exam scheduled for the 10th and I believeth the time of that Final shalt be perfect to not allow me to go to an early morning showing due to my dependency on a bus to get from my university to the theater. It may also make it difficult to go afterwards unless I get out early. If Friday fails, Saturday is a promise December 11th is a promise.

*wanders in, carrying a bag of Starbucks coffee*

Greetings, good monks! 'Tis I, a humble Pilgrim of the Middle Way, come to see how things are going over here at the Monastery. I hath heard rumors of the Spoiled trying to wreak havoc upon thy persons and thy hallowed halls. 'Tis a shame! I have a deep respect for the vows thou art taking. Not all can live the un-spoiled life, myself included. Though, I would like to avoid the viewing of TV spots...perhaps thou might help me abstain?

I hath brought a gift! This bag of coffee was sitting around the Middle Way campsite, but as far as I can tell, we lack a coffee-maker to brew it. Perhaps thou might find it useful? I hath heard legends of thy cappuccino maker.

I post this message to heartily encourage and strengthen (Latin verb: confirmo) all of thee, fellow consorts of mine.

Stay strong! For 'tis only a month afore the Blessed Day arrives. If thou hast remained spoiler-free this long, thee can continue for 30 more days!

*hears something, draws slingshot, climbs up, and peeks over the wall*
*doesn't see anything*
*returns to previous spot to continue giving speech*

Refrain from all- even those of the slightest potential- spoilers which may break thy vows. Depending on which vows thee hath taken, of course. And I do hope your final examination dost not interfere with the Blessed Day, High Knight.

*hears something else, climbs up again, and still doesn't see anything*
*continues speech on top of wall*

Continue keeping your appetite and strength by eating daily the most wonderful cookies of our beloved brethren (and sisters) in the order.
Although I can't eat cookies and I don't drink coffee or soda, so I don't suppose I'll be keeping my strength up that way, but don't worry, I'm fairly inventive, I'll stay healthy. (One has to be inventive to be Narnia's High Queen. You have no idea of the troubles I've had with the elephants lately. I hear daily of my grandfather, King Frank, the first King, and his trials, but I'm certain he went through nothing so troubling as dealing with those elephants!)

Anyway, I did not mean to burden thee with these troubles of mine. And- Ouch!

*looks down, hears snickering, but still doesn't see anything*
*picks up an object off the walltop*

All right, confess. Who's been shooting blunted arrows at me while I've been attempting to encourage y'all?!

How doest thou plan to attend thy viewing? Shalt thou attempteth to attendeth the Midnight Showing? Shalt thy see it Opening Day upon Friday, December 10th? That weekend? Or shalt thy need to wait painfully longer shouldst a theater not be available.

I fear I dost fall in the last catagory. There are no theaters to speak of where I reside (when not in the Monestary ), and those that art here play DVDs. *sigh*

*Walks in and puts a notice up on the wall that reads*:

Dear fellow monks, A thread has recently been started in The Spare Oom titled "Spoiler Level Census" the link is below

viewtopic.php?f=10&t=2168

It is taking a census of how many pople belong to the Monastery, the Middle Way or LoERSM, please comment and cast your vote in favour of our beloved monastery.

What is this foul smell that disturbeth my reverie? Can it be the vile and odious odor of Starbucks coffee? Shall it remain among us, my friends? Nay, for we drink only that pure elixir of the coffee that we ourselves grow in our fair abbey's gardens. Away with these foreign brews that reek of spoilers and moderation! My friends, let not the lure of foreign concoctions draw us into spoiling the glorious moment of enlightenment and rapture when all shall be revealed!

Doth TBG speak the truth? Hath any brought in the vile drink that goeth by the label "Starbucks"? Mine sister hath a several plausible theories about Starbucks. One theory is that they hath lace their drinks with addictive substances so thou must returneth to drinketh more. The other theory tis that is if the vile terrorists that struck the US on the day of September 11, 2001 truly wished to be America to its knees, all they needed to do is take out Starbucks and America would shut down from caffine withdrawls. The latter is a joke, but the former tis quite plausible.

So let it be known in these halls, there shalt be no Starbucks drinks to be brought in. If thou must drinketh of the drink, finish it outside the walls, for the monastery shalt not go industrial. And the most Holy Scriptures sayeth that the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil, and Starbucks appeareth to hath taken that rout. We of the Order shalt not partake in the giving of our money to addictive lull of Starbucks and shalt enjoy the drinks that the Order breweth themselves: fresh, pure, and unaltered.

*awkwardly and embarassdly throws away her cup with the signature star before anyone see's*

Ahhh, High Knight, that art an excellent question! I shall hath to see how mine December goeth before I can answer it with any certainty, but verily, I shouldst be thrilled to go to a midnight release. More likely, I shall go see it in some of the days following its release, if mine crazy life hath calmed down enough for me to be able to go see it and give it due attention.

Welcome to the Monastery, Pilgrim known as Silver the Wanderer! In sooth, thou may take refuge within these hallowed halls and hallowed walls whenever thee like, especially when that which art called TV spots caper too close to thine ears and eyes.

My dear monks, I really doth not think that the Silv'ry Wanderer meant all that to be read into her gift. Were she a minion of the Dark Overlord, I might think so, but she art of the peaceful people of the Middle Way. Now, perhaps the Spoiled Rotten may well be responsible for the bag of coffee being left by the Middle Way campsite, planting it in their innocent clutches for this very devious purpose, but of course it is not monkish to jump to such conclusions.

It wast not I, High Queen.

Ah, the foul brew that is starbucks is an abomination that reeks to the heavens. Whether or no the gift was meant in friendship, it must be thrown out, cast into the fiery chasm from whence it came! Instead, let us inhale the heaven-sent aroma and drink of that divine elixir which is brewed from the beans grown in our own fair monastery.

...or we could just do this...

*uses her random magical gift from ze heavens to transorm ze Starbucks coffee into ze monk's divine elixir*

There ze problem is solved. Personally I never liked coffee anyway, divine or not... to strong on the nose, let alone the taste buds but I hopeth that thoust can enjoy it now...

*returneths to ze Middle Way*

Coffee stains your, teeth, stunts your growth and has a ridiculous amount of caffeine, I propose the Monastery fasts from coffee and drinks tea instead!

[normal speech]Or... *holds up toothbrushes and toothpaste*
Short people rock. And so does caffeine.[/normal speech]