Fortunately, you strike up a conversation with your kidnappers and by agreeing to join the business you avoid being turned over to Empress Bianca.

Unfortunately, the group of kidnappers are already wanted by the law and you're on the run again!

Fortunately, you meet a friendly fisherman, who agrees to bring you to a nearby island where no one who's looking for you will be able to find you.

Unfortunately, the island is populated with zombies.

Fortunately, you have a Gatling gun!

Unfortunately, it's jammed.

Fortunately, there's plenty of coconut oil to grease it.

Unfortunately there aren't any bullets available to use in a Gatling gun.

Fortunately, rumors about zombies being flesh-eating have been grossly exaggerated, and they're willing to leave you alone if you leave them alone.

Unfortunately, they consider your mere presence aggravating enough to try to eat you.

Fortunately, a ship stops to pick up supplies, and you're able to convince them to take you aboard.

Unfortunately, it's a pirate ship and it turns out that you've been shanghaied.

Fortunately, the next time the pirates dock, they get into arguments amongst themselves, giving you the opportunity to escape!

Unfortunately, you get trapped in a fishing net as you make your escape.

Fortunately, the pirates decide you're just too much work and decide to let you go.