She slapped me when I was walking past her and trust me my slap was nothing against those little talons of hers.

You stole all the Christmas presents under the tree!

I'm really The Grinch in a very clever disguise... therefore, I felt it my duty.

You ate the rest of my dark chocolate and raspberry bar!

I was hungry!! and it was so tempting!!

you tripped me and didn't say sorry

Would you have wanted me to let that little boy hit you in the back if the head with that water balloon?

You ate my homework!

you told me you couldn't to do it but were afraid to submit it to your teacher unfinished, so I figured I would help you out. I hope you appreciate my sacrifce, I can't say your homework is the most appetizing thing in the world

You popped all of my special birthday balloons

I'm allergic to balloons and didn't want them getting near me. Besides, they're baloons. They were made for popping. Like bubblewrap

You didn't go see the movie you're most excited for on opening day.

I hadn't gotten my paycheck yet, and... Wait, how does that affect you?

You wouldn't let me on Netflix! For like, two whole hours! I'm dying here!

Yes, and you have no idea how much your parents paid for me to help with your addiction.

You kicked a hole in my TV!

(edit simul-post again) That's because I tripped over your shoe that was lying in the middle of the floor... you're lucky it was the tv that broke, and not my neck!

You forgot to tell me that there was a trapdoor in front of your front door that opened when someone rang the doorbell... I rang the doorbell and it hurt more than my ears 0.0

Oh... I'm truly sorry... that was set up for those Girl Scouts who kept bugging be with some sort of yarn about wanting to sell cookies...

You sabotaged my radio! Now it can only pick up one station... and it's one I can't stand!

I did that so you would learn to appreciate it, it's my favorite station and it annoys me that you don't like it, so now it's the only one you can listen too, maybe that way you'll learn to appreciate it

you filled up my room with feathers....don't you know I'm allergic?

Yes... in fact that's why I filled up the room with feathers... I am attempting to get your immune system to stop over reacting when there's a feather in the room by making it get used to being around feathers all the time

You let the goblins steal the most valuable and powerful object in the kingdom, I told you to guard it with your life... what are we going to do now?

Umm... They asked nicely? And for goblins, they were oddly good looking- and had a coat of arms that looks convently like yours. What's going on around here?

You ate all of my twinkles!!! What am I going to do now?!?

Who? Me? How could I eat all your Twinkies, when I live on the other side of the world and don't even know what they are exactly? Besides you can try other things that are available at the supermarket, such as Tim tams, Honey Jumbles and Mars bars, which are all delicious.

You knew I was visiting, but you didn't stock any Vegemite. What am I supposed to eat with bread and water?

Do you ever eat anything but that awful Vegemite? Besides, I thought it would be nice for you to try some new things to eat, so I didn't bother going to the store. Putting it bluntly, I think you'll live!

You locked me in a closet and I can't get out? Help!