Only because we were throwing you a surprise party, and everyone wasn't hidden yet!

You checked out all the copies of The Hobbit from the library, so I won't be able to check one out before the reading group starts.

You need to focus on your studies, so I made sure that you wouldn't get any books in order to ensure that you wouldn't get sidetracked. Reading groups are fun, but you have more important things to think about right now. Don't worry, there will be more reading groups in the future

You started a day care center in my home, without my permision!!!!!

I know how much you love children and you have a great house and yard for children to play in, so I really didn't think you'd mind. Besides you'll get part of the profit from the business.

You broke my heater, so now it's freezing in the house and all my animals are dying!!!

It's time for all of us to move to a warmer climate, but you didn't want to go, so I had to take some drastic measures. Come on, pack your pets and things and lets go south, now that you have no heating anyway

You went to DisneyLand and didn't invite me to go with you

Well, it was a surprise visit sprung upon me by some friends, so I couldn't really invite anyone else along.

You disconnected the battery in my car.

That wasn't your car, that was a time bomb that looked like your car. The battery was attached to a time bomb that looked like your car.

You glued me to the wall!

Well, maybe next time you'll pay a little more attention when you're told to stop bouncing off the walls.

You gave the children I was babysitting cake and ice cream and now they won't sit still.

I'm sorry that they won't sit still. I felt like celebrating my birthday early and kids always like a celebration so it seemed like a good solution. By the way, here is your piece of cake.

You didn't finish your homework and it is due today.

I was helping everyone else finish their homework, and I ran out of time to work on mine.
(Ack! A little too close for comfort! Thanks for the cake, though. )

You walked off with the book I was in the middle of reading, and it's a really engaging one.

I don't think this book is edifing for you, so I've taken the liberty of prereading it myself first, don't worry if it's good I'll give it back to you

You shaved my head while I was sleeping

Honestly, I'm sorry to say, I really couldn't stand your haircut anymore, ( ) so I decided to give you a fresh start and donate your locks to charity.

You poured soap into my sink to soak the dishes and left the water running. Now my floor is a bubbly, flooded disaster!

I be sorry about that! The sink wouldn't turn off no matter how much force I used on it (I even got a few of me mateys to help me), and I tried to plug the faucet with corks, but it just resulted in makin' things be worse, as the faucet started pourin' out loads more water, so I was decidin' that it be a good idea to flee.

Ye sunk me ship!

Well, I thought Talk-Like-A-Pirate day extended to acting like a pirate, and pirates sink ships, don't they?

You came and stole all the cookies I spent all evening making!

I was craving sweets!!

you let my pet frog go free!!

You didn't know it, but it was a poisonous tree frog, and you could have died!

You stood up in the middle of the quiet, dark theater and shouted directions to a character!