There was a huge mosquito on your nose.

You came along and ate all my cookie dough before I was able to actually bake any cookies.

That's because I'm an evil widdle bunny & I steal cookie dough! *evil laugh*

You broke my ipod!

I'm sorry! I couldn't figure out how to get it to play music and I must've pushed all the wrong buttons until it froze up. (Or it could've been payback for stealing my cookie dough. )

You stole all my shoes and now I have to go around barefoot everywhere.

The shoes were tattered and spiky on the inside, so I had to throw the shoes away. As a matter of fact, I had to throw them away in a trash can other than yours, because yours was full. I left a new pair of shoes on the front porch, and they are the same size as the ones I threw away, so they should fit!

You super-glued noisy bells to my tail (I'm a monkey, after all), and I can't get them off!

I thought it would look cute!

You spilled water on my beautiful drawing!

But.. I thought you said it would look better with watercolours!

You decided to charge my Ipad in an outlet strip with too many things on it already, and so it blew up!

I was trying to help you out; I didn't realise the the circuit would blow and take all the electronics with it. Apparently Apple technology and I really don't get along.

You came to my house at 2 am and sang under my window!

I couldn't sleep, so I figured that if I couldn't sleep, why should you. You can come and sing with me if you like

You smeared my face in ice-cream!

You said you wanted me to share...

You ripped my favorite shirt!

I really, really wanted to try a recycled clothing project! Don't worry, if it turns out, I'll let you keep it when I'm done.

You rewrote all the equations in my textbook and I'm in danger of failing my class now!

I'm from the future. In 10 years there will be great mathmatical breakthrough and all the equations will change anyway.

You turned me into a newt!

that was payback for turning me into a frog, now we are even

You locked me into the closet!

There was a dangerous gas outside of your closet, so I had to push you in the closet, then use a vacuum cleaner to suck the dangerous gas up. I just unlocked the closet, you can come out now.

You planted a bomb in my house!

Yes, I did. But don't worry, it only explodes with candied nuts.

You said I couldn't go to Never Never Land with you... Why would you do that to me?

You wanted to stay there if you ever got to Never Never Land, and I didn't want to deprive everyone here of you.

You auctioned off all of my books!