Its called the "Rob Me Bank." I thought that meant I was allowedb to rob it.

Why is there a hole in the bed?

It's a coaster to hold my drink.

Why did you slam my new iPad into the wall?

Because if I can't have one then neither should you!

Why did you flush my mother's wedding ring down the toilet?

It had a secret compartment that held poison and that was the only way to get it out of your house!

You ripped my sock!

yeah, but it was for a good cause. I almost had glue that was stronger than epoxy until your voice blew up the nitro glycerin.

Where is all the light bulbs go?

um, I wanted to make a disco ball, and I needed something to make it with, but sadly it fell and smashed.....

you dumped a bucked of water on my head!

Well, your hair was on fire.

You just opened the letter I got in the mail today and I'm wondering why you'd do something so rude.

I couldn't help myself. I'm curious by nature and you never tell me anything. It looked like a romantic letter.

Why is the Christmas tree on its side?

Oh, the cat knocked it over.
Why did you eat the last peice of cake? I was saving it.

Yes, of course you were saving it - for me!

Why did you just come running through the kitchen?!

I'm chasing my dog to get my car keys back from her!

You called me by the wrong name!

I'm blind and can't see a thing (not really)!!

You stole the Declaration of Independence!

Of course! I mean, selling it for two billion dollars? What a ripoff!

Care to explain why my room is covered in instant ramen noodles?

Well, I thought you could cook them in a teapot and, umm, you can't. . .

Why did you turn my favorite beach towel into a dog toy?

I thought it was an old rag, it's so worn out.
Why did you let the goat in the house?